Friday, April 30, 2010

Oh, Bahamas, how I miss thee!

A year ago, I headed to the Bahamas with my bestie. What a wonderful trip! As she is immersed in finals this week (hopefully is done by now...) and as I'm accutely reminded that I have 3 small little ones to care for, we are light years away from another vac-A like this one. Well, seemingly light years because we WILL do this again. We WILL. We WILL.


Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Playing in the rain

Have you ever wondered how you were going to pass a LONG afternoon with 3 small kids, knowing that Daddy is going to be home late? Days like today are hard and long. Especially rainy days which are dark and gloomy adding to the sadness of Daddy being home late.

Despite the fact that it was pretty cold outside, I decided to go out in the rain. We felt the drops on our arms, ears, toes and nose and I used the time to explain how God uses the rain to make our vegetables grow and our grass green. The kids suggested we pull out the umbrellas, which of course I said yes too. Oh, the joy! They had a great time but when their lips were turning blue, I decided to call it quits. Of course, the tears fell hard and LOUD from my eldest boy. I quickly suggested a bubble bath in mommy and daddy's tub. Oh, the joy! We had a great time with the toys in the warm bubble bath while it stormed outside.

Now, it's almost 5:00! The afternoon flew. I still need to feed Evan and the kids, which will quickly lead to 6:00 and thereafter. Daddy should be home just before AFV, which is when the kids will wind down from the busy afternoon and then prepare for our bedtime routine.

So, when I sometimes wonder how I'll get through an afternoon, the Lord usually gives me a way to make it fun for me and the kids. Today was no exception, though this was a first we played in the rain. Sometimes, no...oftentimes, I have to trudge through the 3-6 o'clock hours; God uses the trudgin' times too. Today, I'm thankful for the rain and bubble baths, both of which have put smiles on my kids faces which will (hopefully) remain for the remainder of the evening...

Monday, April 26, 2010

Please pray

My niece, Skye, was in a terrible car accident early on Sunday morning. She has a broken femur and is still in the hospital recovering from surgery. My sister- and brother-in-law sound tired and covet prayers for their family.

Skye is a beautiful 17-year-old girl who LOVES horses and rides often. She lives on a farm with her parents and has a lot of responsibilities with the animals. With a broken femur, there is a LONG road to recovery and I'm sure will be life-changing for the entire family.

I praise God that Skye is alive! Please pray for emotional and physical healing Skye and that God will be glorified in this.

Saturday, April 24, 2010


Do you ever wonder why there are such stark memories of moments when it comes up on a year since that moment happened? Why is that? Like first birthdays (one and two (and yet one more eventually...)) or first wedding anniversaries. Or like "it's been one year since we've moved here". Or the year after a memorable death. Or the year after 9/11. Those significant one year markers cause me to step back and reflect. Not just the simple "oh, remember that?" but I really reflect. I don't know what it is about those one year milestones, but they are very significant.

Today marks a huge one for me.

A lot of you don't know how difficult last year was for me and my family. February through...well, Evan's birth, was very significant in our family. God did a major overhaul in our lives last year. February 6th through April 24th of last year was a time where I struggled with great sin that affected the most important relationships in my life, especially between me and God. I was fighting Him, running from my husband and my children looking for ways to escape the life God had given me. My very best friend in the whole wide world gave me a scripture last year during this time frame of my life that I breathed in and grasped to with every fiber of my being, holding me close to God with a fragile thread:

The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

Psalm 16:5-6

I had a hard time believing that God could allow my my chosen portion to be so miserable. How could the lines of my life be pleasant? And 3 kids rather than 2? Man, that was not beautiful, or so I thought. God???? Where were you? I didn't have anybody last year. Even when my friend gave me that scripture verse, she had no idea what was going on in my life until later. Yet God used her. Man, I'm thankful.

On April 24, 2009 I turned away from that which was distracting me from my chosen portion. I was like Joseph who ran from Potipher's wife. This sin grabbed me, alluring me away from my Master, telling me no one would know my sin. My sin had me by the coattails and I had a choice: give in or turn and run. Can you imagine what Joseph dealt with? The consequences he faced of just associating with that woman? The years in prison? Do you think he ever wondered what would have happened if he just gave in and indulged in sin? I think he thought about it. He was sinful like me. But instead, Joseph chose God and even through years and years of turmoil, God delivered him and restored his relationship with the King and most importantly his family. God helped me choose to run away. And I pray He will receive all the glory because I couldn't have run away without Him there to run to.

There are consequences of my sin, like memories of what life was, the months and months of restoration back to God and my husband, and emotional turmoil of why I wasn't strong enough to choose God during those months and months of hardship. I think I will always face the battle of “I do the things I don’t want to do but the things I want to do those I don’t do." Just like Paul.

My marriage almost failed. I did not want my life as it was. I did not want my son, who was growing quickly in my womb. I did not want God.

That was a year ago.

Today, I'm a new person: in love with my husband, thankful for God's grace through Evan (man, God's timing was PERFECT with my pregnancy with him...), blessed beyond words, moving closer to God and wanting to renew my mind with the things of heaven and not earth. The lines of my life have fallen for me in pleasant places. I did not believe it a year ago.

I believe it today.

You know, there are still a lot of people who do not know what Patrick and I faced last year. And maybe I'm making it sound worse that it really was, but to me it was miserable. I've realized through all that we went through how important it is to rally around our believing brothers and sisters in Christ. Our pastor has been preaching in Philippians over the past few weeks, encouraging us to surround ourselves with a fellowship to help us stay strong in the midst of a battle. We did not do this last year. Honestly, I can only count on one hand (plus a few) how many people know the details of what we went through. And it's not because I wasn't willing to talk about it. I NEEDED to talk about it but no one was willing to listen. And that isn't entirely the fault of others. I didn't make myself available to others, too, to share such a burden. I was so engrossed with "staying connected" through Facebook or other means that I became disconnected with my friends. I spent so much time giving away my time to time-toilets. That's why I've given up stuff like Facebook. I just don't want those kind of friendships. I want friendships that I can invest in and lean on. I don't want my friends to EVER think that I don't want to bear their burdens. How can they know that if I don't invest? Can you also believe that no one has followed up with me about my sin? Can you believe that no one has held me accountable since? Shame on me for not opening myself up to those kind of relationships. I'm praying for someone here to be burdened for me. And I'm not writing this as a WANT ad...please know that. It's just a prayer I'm praying right now that ALL of you should pray. Pray for God to burden someone's heart for YOU. And pray that your heart be burdened for someone, too.

Today is a huge day for me. I'm glad this milestone is passed. I'm no longer bound to this sin, praise God. He has delivered me. It doesn't mean that I'm not tempted to give into the SAME sin. God is showing me ways to keep on runnin', which means sacrifices that I don't want to make. And man, sacrifice is H-A-R-D!

This time last year I ran towards God, even when sin had me by the coattails. I ran towards what was pure, lovely, good, virtuous, and praise-worthy: things worth thinking about and remembering.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Birthday Party Pictures!

Mallory had a WONDERFUL birthday party. We've been talking about it for weeks and knew what she wanted for her party and I think the entire weekend was a hit. Mommy is worn out, but I'm so happy that my little girl had such a special day.

Mallory has grown quite a special affinity to the flag of Norway. She asked weeks ago for a Norway cake. In addition to Norway, I decided to make United Kingdom and Germany cakes too, her second and third favorite flags. We had HUGE flags waving from the deck and small flags on her cake table. We had the jumping castle set up and had a wonderful spread of grillin' goods. Patrick manned the grill and did a fantastic job, I must say. Mallory received a Norway shirt made by our friends and a Norway pillow made by my mom. She was excited about them both, that's for sure. She's our Norway girl.

On that midnight train to Georgia...

Oh, I wish how I could take a train to Georgia rather than drive alone with my 3 little ones! BUT, with my parents coming to town with my kids for Mallory's birthday, I had help on at least one leg of the Georgia journey to visit my parents for a few days. The kids and I decided to come to Gommy and Poppy's house while Patrick has a crazy work week. For those of you who don't know, crazy work weeks for Patrick means crazy weeks for me, too. So, we came to Elberton.

And oh, the kids are happy.

They've been going to bed late and waking up early, running hard outside, playing hide and seek, going on nature walks, eating pizza at Papa's Pizza To-Go, enjoying additional channels on digital cable that we don't get at home, playing with new toys, giggling and laughing A LOT. Evan has a difficult time settling down at new places so I've had to rock him to sleep at almost every naptime and bedtime (but really, that's OK). Ethan has been waking up before 6am ready to play. Gommy and Poppy are more worn out that normal (wonder why...). I did get to take a nap this morning because of my LONG night last night with my boys both peeing out of their diapers and needing clothes changes in the middle of the night. Going out of town has it's ups and downs. There are lots of ups. Lots and lots of them. But, the kids push additional limits whenever they are in a new environment. They've missed their Daddy. We've talked to Daddy a few times since we've been gone and his encouragement to "glorify God by obeying Mommy" has honestly helped them keep things in perspective.

We head home tomorrow. The 3.5 hour trek will probably take about 5 hours, but at least we'll eventually get home. There will be lots of whining and screaming and crying, but it's usually worth it. I miss my hubby. The kids miss their Daddy. But it's just SO fun coming to Gommy and Poppy's house.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Happy Birthday Mallory!

My baby is turning 4 today. She's still sleeping and I can't wait to greet here this morning. It was this time 4 years ago I started the whole pushing process to bring her into this world. She arrived at 7:59am. Man, that was a crazy morning...

Today, though, I've got Banana Chocolate Chip muffins (with a dash of cinnamon...a spice I've figured out that she likes) in the oven, anticipating the moment that Mallory wakes up for smiles and birthday wishes. Today, she wants to color, play with stickers, go to the park, have a picnic, and play in the jumping castle. I think we can do it all. I've still go laundry to do during the down times, but with Gommy and Poppy here today I think we can do it all!

I can't wait to blog about the party on Saturday. Wow, it was a hit! Mallory was SOO excited and was in a state of pure joy during the event, and really just plain joyful this whole weekend.

Happy Birthday, sweet girl.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

This time 4 years ago...

I was overdue for the birth of my first child. My baby will be turning 4 on Monday and I've been running around like a crazy woman getting ready for her party on Saturday. The decor is purchased. The events are planned. The shopping list is ready. Family starts coming in town tomorrow. There is still food to buy and a cake to bake and decorate. There is still LOTS to do, but I'm just plain excited. I love celebrating milestones. Especially ones like the birth of my first child.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Back on the Blog again.

Well, I miss blogging. I really do. I love looking back at what I've written over the last few years and remembering the good things. And the crazy things. And the hard things. Remembering the babies, the moves, the sicknesses, the silly things said, and all the in betweens make me happy. I don't have a lot of these writings over the last several months that I'll be able to look back on, and that makes me sad. I have lots of excuses, too. I'm good at excuses. Yes, I have 3 kids - 3 NEEDY kids, mind you. Yes, I can barely find time to take a shower between loads of laundry and breastfeeding. But do you know what's been a big-ol' time-waster? Facebook.

So, I'm going to take a break from it. Facebook has just but one of those quickie things for me to be in touch with people by not getting too involved. Now, what good is that doing for me? I get a bunch of information and let out a bit of my own by not adding much worth to my day but most importantly my spirit. I've been convicted that giving up Facebook for a time (or for forever...I don't know) is a sacrifice I must make. It's been affecting me mentally and spiritually. That sounds strange, doesn't it? This gradiouse and totally awesome application that touches millions of people at a superficial level is really causing me to stumble. It just zaps so many snippets of my time that are precious not only to me, but to my husband and children. Who really cares what I think about if I'm heading to Chick-Fil-A or not? Well, maybe you would've been interested to know that I headed there today at 3pm in order to avoid a major self-destructive erruption at my kids! Anyway...

I figured that no one really would miss me too terribly on Facebook. And if you did really miss me, you could:

1. Follow my blog or maybe you might even
2. Send me an email. Or maybe if your feeling REALLY friendly you might even
3. Call me on the phone. And if you REALLY REALLY wanted to check in on me you might even
4. Pay me a visit at home.

I've decided that I've been too impersonal with my friends, too. So, I'm collecting phone numbers and email addresses...even home addresses. I've been convicted to step out of my comfort zone and actually be more friendly by calling/writing/visiting. Talking on the phone isn't easy for me. But how can I expect others to do for me if I can't do it myself?

Bleh, I've rambled on enough. I've got a bazillion things on my mind that have been backlogged for months. So, I'm hoping to be back on the blog. Again.